


Because Life Was Apparently Too Simple Otherwise

by Lumelle



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Humor, Implied Mpreg, Kid Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-27 03:17:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15015470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lumelle/pseuds/Lumelle
Summary: Tony isn't exactly upset that Steve's grop is coming back, amnesty and all. However, he knows things will get awkward given where his relationship with Steve left off.Of course, he hadn't been counting on the teeny tiny complication of apparently being a father all of a sudden.





	Because Life Was Apparently Too Simple Otherwise

Tony was not fidgeting, and anyone who suggested otherwise could just walk right off the helipad.

All right, so perhaps that wasn’t such a great idea, considering the way Pepper was smirking at him right now. And Rhodey. It seemed Vision was the only one in their small group who wasn’t about to start teasing him any moment now, and that was probably only because Vision was too preoccupied keeping an eye on the sky himself. As much as Tony didn’t appreciate people implying that he was in any way anything but perfectly calm, he also didn’t like the idea of telling what essentially passed for his family to jump off.

He still wasn’t fidgeting, though. He was Tony Stark, he was beyond fidgeting. Any nerves he might have been showing were entirely normal, bordering on casual. That at least was not up for an argument.

For all that he wanted to seem calm and collected, though, Tony froze as Vision suddenly shot up to the air, eyes fixed on something beyond human vision. “They are coming!”

Indeed, a mere moment later the sleek form of a Wakandan plane appeared on the horizon above the familiar skyline. Tony was momentarily distracted by the itch to get his hands on all that beautiful technology, but only for a moment. The next second he was frozen again as he had to face the fact this was actually happening.

Steve was coming back.

Tony was happy, of course. His anger had long since faded, and by now he was simply relieved the lengthy negotiations had actually born fruit. Clint and Ant-Man had been cleared up first, they’d had the least part in the whole mess after all, and after some time in nominal house arrest they’d been cleared of the whole mess. The rest had been more difficult to handle, though, and Tony was fairly sure even his best negotiation skills would have failed if he hadn’t had the surprise aid of the king of Wakanda throwing around his political weight. Now, though, Steve and his allies were cleared of the international terrorism charges and all the other bullshit that had been piled on them, and they were finally coming back. After working on it for so long, of course Tony was happy.

As for why he felt more nervous than happy, well, that was a different matter altogether. It certainly wasn’t anything to do with the little disaster of a relationship he’d managed to have with Steve before it had all fallen apart. Nope. He was going to be a mature adult and not try to bring it up while they were all still going to be very jumpy around each other for a while, and he was absolutely not nervous about seeing Steve again.

Sometimes Tony wished he hadn’t long since passed the point where he could even try to lie to himself.

The plane approached at rather impressive speeds only to come to a surprisingly gentle halt right above the tower. Beautiful, stunning tech got to work lowering the sleek plane down to the helipad, and for a moment Tony actually forgot about Steve as he was distracted by the gorgeous sight in front of him.

The whole plane was a work of art, really, and Tony was halfway through composing a speech to hopefully convince the Wakandan princess to share her secrets with her by the time the hatch actually opened. At which point, of course, any rational words were wiped from his mind.

Wanda was the first one to rush out, which was not exactly surprising. Tony probably should have questioned the way she and Vision immediately embraced each other, given the fact the two had not exactly parted on the best of terms, but he was also very aware of Vision’s bad habit of dropping off the radar from time to time. Really, he was just glad to see it had probably been for a secret affair and not anything more sinister.

He half expected Steve to be next, and already tensed up in anticipation. Instead, however, he found Natasha making her exit with a familiar sway in her steps, her no-nonsense look melting into a smile at Pepper’s warm greeting. Falcon and the Winter Soldier were next, and it was a true testament to how much time Tony had spent thinking about all this that he did not immediately get on the defensive at seeing the ex-assassin. He’d been assured that Barnes hadn’t been in his right mind while controlled by Hydra, and he had given his word not to hold it against the man, but it still wasn’t easy to just brush off the memory of seeing his parents murdered.

Perhaps Cap’s team had anticipated this, since any tension was wiped away in favor of utter shock as the next figure came down from the plane.

“Wait.” Tony finally found his voice, pointing at the unmistakable figure of Pietro Maximoff. “You’re supposed to be dead.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not exactly known for doing what I’m supposed to do.” Just like that, the brat smirked. “Should have probably warned you, but I wasn’t going to let my precious little sister come along without me to watch her back.”

“Actually, if we take into account the time you were away, I am not older than you.” Wanda seemed perfectly content to stand there in Vision’s arms, and Pietro didn’t seem too tempted to blow up any androids, so Tony supposed the brotherly protection wasn’t about this aspect at least.

“Nonsense. Once a big brother, always a big brother.” There was more friendly bickering, or so Tony assumed, but he didn’t exactly have ears for any of it anymore. His attention was drawn to the hatch at the sound of more footsteps. Ignoring all the happy greetings and reunions going on around him, Tony stepped closer to the plane, drawn despite himself to see Steve properly after so long.

Tony would have liked to say Steve hadn’t changed a bit, but that would have obviously been bullshit. He looked more tired than before, and that beard was an interesting choice to be sure. Still, even with the tired eyes and the almost wary look Steve gave him, it was still Steve Rogers, Captain America, and the love of his fucking life if Tony had ever admitted to such feelings even to himself. This was exactly what he had missed for years now, and honestly, it had been all his fault that he had lost it in the first place.

What was not so familiar, however, was the child propped up on Steve’s hip.

“What’s this? One surprise guest wasn’t enough?” Tony tilted his head to the side, examining the child. He was rubbish at estimating child ages, but he was pretty sure this one was younger than two years. That made sense, he was pretty sure he would have noticed if Cap’s team had included actual children.

“Yes, well, we couldn’t exactly leave her behind.” There was something strange about Steve’s expression, but Tony couldn’t quite pinpoint what. “This is my daughter, James Rogers.” Now Steve’s eyes were almost defiant, as though challenging Tony to say anything.

Daughter? For a moment Tony almost considered one of the women on Steve’s team, then dismissed them just as quickly. Steve treated Wanda as a little sister more than anything, and Natasha didn’t exactly seem the maternal type. If he recalled right, Steve had mentioned that he had the bearing gene, though that still left the question of the other parent. The kid’s eyes were just as blue as Steve’s, but the hair was darker, almost black. Barnes? It would make sense with the name. “Please don’t tell me that’s the latest addition to the proud line of assassins. My pride can’t take being threatened by something that small.” Why, yes, he was using so-called witty comments to shield himself from the inevitable heartbreak. He should have expected this, really, it wasn’t like he’d given Steve a lot of reasons to wait for him to get his head out of his ass.

“Not quite.” Steve seemed… amused? Was he that happy to see Tony suffering? “Tony, she was born about seven months after we fought.”

For all that he was proud of his usually quick wits, Tony needed a moment for this to truly sink in. Once it did, he turned to stare at the kid, then back at Steve, then at the kid again. “Wait. You were pregnant? With my kid?” He was vaguely aware his voice was reaching almost hysterical levels now, but he couldn’t really stop himself. Perhaps he shouldn’t have had quite so much coffee to calm his nerves beforehand. “Fuck. I fought with you while you were pregnant?” And here he’d thought he couldn’t make more of a mess at relationships than his own father had.

“You didn’t know. And, to be fair, I didn’t know either.” Steve glanced at the child, and his expression softened instantly. “She rather forced me to change my plans.”

“You should have — no, forget that.” Tony sighed. “I really can’t blame you for not contacting me. It’s not like I had given you much reason to trust me.”

“It wasn’t about that.” Steve shook his head. “Well, not just that. It’s all been… complicated.”

“To say the least.” Tony swallowed. Now that he looked more closely at the kid, he could see some of his own features on her little face. “She’s beautiful.”

“Isn’t she?” Steve took on a thoroughly besotted smile. “Hey, Jamie? Say hi to papa Tony.”

Tony’s breath caught at the words. A moment later he was pretty sure his heart was going to stop entirely as the little girl looked at him with those shining blue eyes, Steve’s eyes, and lifted a hand in a tiny wave. “Hi!”

Tony wasn’t sure if it was more the shock of finding out he had unknowingly turned into a terrible father, or the fact he hadn’t consumed anything but coffee in the last couple of days while ironing out the details. Either way, the end result was that he suddenly felt very dizzy, Steve’s voice growing distant in his ears. God, he’d turned into an actual cliche.

He wasn’t sure who caught him as everything turned black, but judging by the faint sound of “Well, anyone could’ve seen that coming,” he could make an educated guess once he actually woke up.

*

By the time Steve’s people had been back for a month or so, not only was it clear that this was not a dream, but Tony was also starting to get somewhat used to the whole mess.

Sure, he was doomed to be an absolute failure as a parent and made sure to tell Steve as much, but he had to at least try. After all, it was unlikely he could be any worse at it than his own father had been, and he would take any opportunity to show up Howard.

Jamie was an easygoing child, it seemed, always full of smiles and giggles. Took after Steve, then, since Tony definitely wasn’t the cheerful type. Still, he had to admit that spending time with the kid wasn’t always awful. She was way too young to play in his lab yet, but she seemed to like napping on his chest at least and was always happy to listen to him ramble on even when everyone else had wandered off a while ago. Tony was working hard on finding the balance between wanting to spoil the kid and not wanting to come across as buying her love, but he figured Steve would alert him if he got too far in the wrong direction. So far Steve seemed to be just fine with the way he interacted with Jamie, though.

Steve. That was another problem, and a much bigger one, not just because he was actually a grown up. Their relationship had been left in a rather precarious state to say the least, and two years of separation hadn’t exactly fixed anything. Even so, they both seemed to be avoiding the subject. Putting on a front for the sake of the child, Tony caught himself thinking, and then wished he hadn’t thought of anything at all.

As it turned out, they had Falcon of all people to thank for their breakthrough. The man wasn’t even trying to be subtle about it, either. Instead, he marched into the living room one day, picked up Jamie, and announced he was babysitting. Before either Tony or Steve could say anything, he pointed a finger at them both.

“Not a word. You two need to talk through your shit, and she’s your excuse not to. You get her back in the morning, and you’d have better have talked by then.”

Jamie apparently had nothing against getting kidnapped, giggling as Falcon bounced her on his arm on the way out. Tony and Steve were left looking at each other, warily trying to assess each other’s reactions.

In the end, this was all a moot point, as they just ended up fucking right on the couch before any actual talking was done. Well, they did have a couple of years of pent-up tension to work through, after all.

By the time they had relocated to Tony’s room Steve did insist on actually talking, and for once, Tony didn’t try to stop him. There was more between them than one post-coital conversation could sort out, but he figured it was a start. Also, he was quite happy to talk as much as Steve wanted if that meant more of the amazing sex.

Falcon and Ant-Man were making tiny pancakes for Jamie in the kitchen as Tony and Steve walked out in the morning, getting on almost suspiciously well. At the sight of their united approach the two glanced at each other, then back at Steve and Tony.

“Just so you know,” Ant-Man said with a cheery tone, “you might want to keep in mind that the living room doesn’t actually have doors.”

Tony, of course, was way beyond shame, but he had to admit Steve was adorable when he flushed.

*

Jamie was, in Tony’s absolutely unbiased opinion, the prettiest little girl ever.

Okay, so perhaps he was a bit biased, but that was pretty much his job. Also, it helped that she was indeed very cute. Her taste in clothing was a bit eclectic, sure, but as long as her party outfits were Auntie Pepper approved Tony figured it didn’t matter if she ran around in superhero t-shirts and mismatched socks. Well, as long as she liked her Iron-Man shirt the best, of course. Anything else would have been a betrayal.

As such, he didn’t really pay much attention to such details when Jamie, now five and a half years old, ran into his lab. “Papa! Papa, guess what?”

“What is it, peanut?” He glanced at her just enough to see her smile, then turned back to the diagram he’d been working on. Clearly there was no emergency if she was so cheerful, and she knew by now that he was listening even if he wasn’t looking at her.

“Daddy got me a new shirt!”

Well, that was new. Steve rarely got her clothes, mostly because she was convinced his taste in clothes was boring, and also because between Tony and Pepper she had a big enough wardrobe to outfit a couple of school buses worth of kids. Perhaps this was yet another ploy to get her into Captain America gear, because Steve was evil like that. “Oh? That’s nice.”

“Look!” This time, her voice was more demanding, and Tony figured he’d best follow orders. Saving the diagram and swiping it to the side, he turned to give her a proper look beyond just making sure she was in one piece and not crying.

“So, what is it — oh.” Tony blinked. The t-shirt wasn’t that different from her usual attire, a bright yellow that clashed horribly with her pink jeans, but that was hardly the important part. No, the thing that caught his attention were the large letters plastered across her chest.

“BIG SISTER!”

Tony stared at her for a moment longer. As he lifted his gaze, he found Steve standing in the doorway to the lab, smirking at him. At Tony’s questioning look, Steve nodded and touched his stomach, smiling a little.

In Tony’s defense, this time he didn’t faint.


End file.
